How Do Parent Coaches Work?

Coaches provide assistance in a variety of ways, depending on the needs of the family and the services offered by the coach. Some parents need help facing a specific difficulty with a child, so the coach may offer a focused approach. Other parents may have general questions or concerns about certain issues, such as discipline, so a coach may offer guidance in how best to parent the children.

Generally, parents seeking a coach have questions about the often mysterious world of parenting and they just don't feel comfortable asking anyone else. These parents may be geographically or emotionally distant from their own parents. Their healthcare providers may be too busy to provide answers to complex problems, and parents may not feel that their issues require mental health services. Books, magazines, and websites can be helpful, but some parents feel the need for more individualized help. Parents today are so busy, that few have time to spend with other families in their neighborhoods—an interaction that sometimes yields support and advice. Parent coaching for these families can offer a welcome line of guidance and support.

As with any trend, there are some are critics. Some point to the service as another example of outsourcing parenting responsibilities to paid professionals and worry that the trend may continue to grow in popularity. Other naysayers are concerned that there are no uniform regulations for parent coaching. However, there are several coach training programs, such as the Parent Coach Institute in Bellevue, Washington, that do offer their own accreditation programs.

Critics like Andrea, a mother of four from New Brunswick, Canada, are concerned that reliance on parent coaches will further erode parent's confidence in his or her own abilities. "Families are bombarded at every turn that they aren't doing anything right in their parenting," worries Andrea. "And they can't possibly know what it is they're supposed to do without reliance on expert help," she says.

Despite critique, a good parent coach can empower parents to use their own wisdom to make good family decisions. This is the focus of Masarie's practice. "I know that parents have the wisdom to be responsive, but they often just need someone to remind them of that." Masarie makes a special effort to be very cautious about giving advice and prefers to help parents think aloud and come to their own conclusions about parenting. Speidel concurs that making moms and dads more confident is an important part of coaching. After all, every coach knows that he or she cannot be in a client's life forever—so the goal is to help parents function on their own and confidently raise their families.