In the living room, my daughter is singing along with Big Bird:

“Everyone makes mistakes, oh yes they do, your sister and your brother and your dad and mother too!”

In the kitchen, I cringe, recognizing that the wisdom of this Muppets is right on target. Sure, maybe on TV’s “Father Knows Best,” but at home we don’t have scripts – and yes, we make mistakes. Here are some of the most common mistakes – and some good advice on how to turn them around:

• Letting Kids’ Activities Overwhelm Your Schedule: Sure, you used to have a life. Now you have soccer games, swim practice, gymnastics, and tennis lessons. “Don’t let the youth sports cartel run your life,” says Jen Singer, author of You’re A Good Mom (and Your Kids Aren’t So Bad Either). “Until your kids are at least in 5th grade, limit them to one sport per season. It’s easier on you, your kids’ knees, and your mini-van’s tires if you’re not rushing from one sport to another all year long.”

• Using Language That Shuts Down Communication: You may think you’re talking straight to your kids, but what you say and what they hear may be too different things. As Mike Domitrz of the Date Safe Project says,”’If anyone touches you, I’ll kill ‘em,” is a line most daughters have heard at one point or another. This statement is very damaging.  If someone does touch the daughter inappropriately, she may be too scared to tell anyone because she’s afraid of her parents’ reaction.” A better solution? Remind your children you’re there for them always, without making threats.

Another mistake? Telling your kids what life will be like “in the real world.” “A teenager’s world is so real that suicides are highest in the teenage years,” Domitrz says. “Do not belittle your child’s life. Instead, relate to their struggles so they know you are there to support them.”

• Do As I Say, Not As I Do: Yeah, right. Actions speak louder than words, buddy. And would you really want your kids to be following a hypocrite?

Alright, then. Remember your children’s eyes are upon you, and what you do does matter. Even small lies (like, “Oh, tell her I’m not home,” when the gabby neighbor calls) can be a go-ahead to other untruths. And when you lose the honesty in the relationship, what do you have left?

• Avoiding the “Big Talk”: Not all conversations will be fun, but it’s our job as parents to do the tough stuff – and that includes talking about sex. “It’s a mistake to think you can keep children immune from outside influences and sexually naïve until you’re ready to talk about sex,” says Melanie J. Davis, M.Ed., of Honest Exchange LLC. “In reality, children need and want to learn about sexuality, values, and decision making from their parents. And it’s not just the mechanics of puberty and reproduction they need to learn about, but also how to recognize and insist on healthy relationships.” Davis suggests encouraging your children to take pride in their sexual selves, even if their appearance, orientation, and gender don’t fit the norm. “We can help them think about their sexual boundaries and gain skills in communicating so those boundaries are respected,” she says.

• The “We’re Buddies” Syndrome: You may want to be their friend, but your children need you to be their parent. “Children, especially young ones, need a dependable, confident authority in their life,” says Brenda Nixon, MA, author of Parenting Power in the Early Years. She cites the following as examples of not stepping up to the parenting plate: being wishy-washy about rules, begging for cooperation, or acting like an emotional toddler.” Don’t cheat a child out of having a parent. Be the parent and let the same-age playmates be his friends,” she advises.

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